The Little Ant

 

 

I like to watch the ants work. They’re so busy and preoccupied with their work that they don’t notice this giant human looking down on them. They’re so busy cutting up leaves, trying to haul them along on their little backs to their little colony. They’re just trying to save up and provide for their little antly needs. My existence and my life is so irrelevant to them; they just keep on working.

Many times we are like the ants too. It’s easy to get caught up in the stress of our lives that we don’t realize our Heavenly Father waiting for us to look up at Him. He’s waiting for us to enjoy His existence and His life by seeking Him and His Kingdom first. He is the Provider of everything we need. How much more will our Father give us when we ask Him, if He so freely provides the ants with what they need?

Or do we not realize that this world and everything in it is passing away? One day Jesus will come back for His church, His bride; and if we are so preoccupied with this world we will miss our Groom’s return which is so near! It will happen in the blink of an eye! One second we’re here, the next we’ll meet our Redeemer in the sky! Everyone on this earth who isn’t ready will stay behind. I don’t know about you but I don’t want to miss my own wedding with Jesus Christ!

I don’t want to be like the ants, who work so hard for a provision that only fills my belly for a moment; a provision that only clothes and shelters my body with materials that can be lost, stolen or broken. I want to store up my treasures for eternity, to live and share my life with my Groom, my Jesus! I want to meet Him face to face, and live with Him under the covering of His love for ever and ever!

What about you? Are you ready for the rapture? Or are you an ant who is meaninglessly toiling their life away? It is good to work, but don’t forget to whom your life belongs.

Disclaimer: I am not a scholar or a theologian. I’m just a repentant sinner who has a personal relationship with her Lord, Jesus Christ.

Made for Love

I know of a young woman, who all her life chased the illusion of love. She always gave her heart away to the first boys who passed her by. Frogs disguised as princes, who could never offer her what her heart most desired. Yet she chased and chased and chased so many frogs, giving away the pieces of her heart to be recklessly broken again and again. You’d think she’d learn after a while, but she was just so thirsty for love… When she finally realized that love could be found in none other but the Prince of Peace, she still treated Him with caution; as if He too would break her heart like the impostors of her past. Every time He’d try to show her the love she desired, she ran away in the opposite direction, to impostors who disguised themselves in robes of light. She’d break her Prince’s heart each and every time she ran away, but He would allure her back in by consistently showing her that His love is true.

He gave her promises of a life worth living, a life of Worship, and of a prince for her made in His likeness. He showed her first that she needed cleansing, a new heart, and a new spirit. So He began to cleanse her with His Words of Life and Righteousness. He dressed her in robes of white, and crowned her head with flowers of Grace. He mended her broken soul, and filled her life with purpose, then He began to give His lovely thoughts and desires to be her own. He showed her her worth, and poured into her heart all the love she craved. He said to her, “you are Mine, my lovely bride, my betrothed. I am yours.”

She found herself embraced in a love like no other; a love she never knew. A love that can’t be found in mere mortals, but is found only in the One who formed her soul. A love so pure, a love so forgiving, so sweet, honest and sincere. A love that is selfless and is truly satisfying. This love chases away all the fears she ever knew. This love is like a light that swallows up the evils of the night and gives her heart certain hope of joyful days.

Today she is seeing the promises that her Prince of Peace spoke to her begin to manifest; promises of Worship and of the prince made for her in His likeness– that it breaks her heart to imagine that she ever thought that she could find love in anyone or anything but in the King of kings! But she realizes today that she was made for love. A love story worthy of the cross, a love story worthy of rings and to spend in the presence of her God for all eternity…

Only The Beginning

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Still trying to process how much Jesus loves me. Still trying to process the things that He is beginning to bring to pass for me. Still trying to process that Jeremiah 29:11 is God’s plan for me and all I can do is cry. All I can do is stare at the beauty of God’s hands and thank Him for the grace given to me today, and ask Him to give me the strength and the courage of Joshua 1:9.

To live, and breathe is beautiful and I am thankful to share my tears with Him as I stare out into the mountains in the presence of His love. I am undeserving of such great blessings. All I can do is cry. We just arrived in Costa Rica a week ago, and I’m already beginning to see the beautiful promises that God has for my life personally, begin to unfold, and it’s overwhelming. I can’t go too deep in detail yet, but I can tell you that this feels all too surreal. I still can’t even believe that I’m here. I can’t believe that I’m part of the choir, and that I might be coming back sooner than what I expected. I can’t even begin to express to you in words how beautiful the presence of God fills this whole church when the whole congregation begins to worship the One True Living God! His embrace is tangible as He begins to crumble the hardened areas of my heart. It’s literally like a breeze of purity that flows through the whole building and it gently lifts up one’s hands in surrender.

Love. It’s pure love. His presence is love and it consumes my whole soul as I give Him all of me, and He gives me strength in return. I’m in love and this can’t be real. This can’t be real but it’s all too real. I’m still trying to process this; Jesus is so real. His tomb is empty, He’s alive, and He’s with me. He’s my groom and I’m His bride. I’m letting go of all of the distractions on the way to the alter as I run to His arms. I’m letting go of the past as He shows me that I have no more shame to suffer. I am His. He is mine, and in my life He will be glorified.

I’m so in awe of my God, and this is only the beginning of what He’s promised me! As the attacks of the enemy come my way to try to steal my joy, my hope, and my peace, the Holy Spirit will remind me that Jesus gave me life in abundance, and that He already overcame the world. Fear is an illusion that can’t stand up to the giant that is my God, because my Maker is my husband. No weapons formed against me shall prosper because the Lord Almighty is my righteousness and He fights for me.  It is finished. My life is complete at the cross.

Jesus, you are for me. What I can’t do, you can. I surrender my all to you.

Finally Back in Costa Rica

 

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Photo by me.

It all began on Sunday afternoon when we returned home from the powerful church service after my dad preached. The Lord used a brother from the church to warn me about the troubles that would be coming our way; I need to be careful while our stay in Costa Rica by being vigilant and sober minded to the rising attacks of the enemy. So I told my dad about this warning in the car ride on our way home, and he shared with me that it was a confirmation, because unknowingly the pastors of the church took him aside also and told him the same thing! To my relief, we both came to the mutual understanding that the Lord is in control of everything, and not a single weapon formed against us will prosper in Jesus’ name. To those of you who serve or served in the military, my dad half-jokingly told me, “you watch my six, and I’ll watch yours.” “No one dies in advised warfare”, especially when our victory is already at the cross in Jesus Christ! Jesus is Lord and he will turn around every plan of the enemy for our good. 🙂

 

The beginning of our troubles welcomed us as soon as we got home from church; we literally walked into a sauna! The air conditioner conveniently broke on the day before that we left for our trip, and more so convenient on the weekend! If we couldn’t contact the apartment’s maintenance before we left, we’d end up coming home to an oven at the end of our trip. Thank God we were able to talk to someone, and everything will be taken care of during the week. That day we really felt the Florida summer heat. We’re so spoiled with the AC, because we realized that in 84 degrees with the windows open is no joke! But this was our consolation: hell is hotter, hahaha!

On our way to the airport yesterday, we were delayed in traffic due to a nasty car accident on the turnpike, but the delay of the traffic actually saved our lives up ahead! As we were approaching the airport, we witnessed a scary car accident that happened just a few hundred yards in front of us. A scrap of metal from an eighteen wheeler was in the middle of the road and the car in front of us was going full speed. It seemed that the driver didn’t have enough time to slow down his car to evade the danger on the road, so he hit the breaks and swerved off to the shoulder of the road, hitting the rear of his car on a light post! The light post then fell into the middle of the road, and thanks to God the driver didn’t go into the post head first, and that the poll didn’t fall on his car, or ours, because we were right behind him! Thankfully the driver of his car came out safely with no scratches but he was, of course, a little shaken. Thanks to God as well that the traffic behind us delayed our distance further ahead; that accident could have been us, or worse!

Nevertheless, we actually made it to the airport on good time! The waiting didn’t go on forever and we actually enjoyed every moment of the process as our anticipation rose to mount the plane! I think my favorite part about traveling in an airplane is ascending and descending. The earth below looks so small, like an ant farm working efficiently. The clouds in comparison are majestic as they dress the sky in white robes of puffiness. Somehow, being so high in the sky, makes me feel like I’m closer to God (even though I know that’s not the case). It’s just like, I could look out and imagine Jesus and his angels walking on the clouds, and here I am, just a tiny human who needs a plane to reach an atmosphere of the heights of His heavens.

When the pilot announced that turbulence was up ahead, I began to brace myself. I don’t have fear of heights, but feeling the plane drop a few altitudes to stabilize itself isn’t the greatest feeling. So in that moment I took out my bible and turned to Psalm 72 and began to read, then I began to hum songs of praise to myself and I felt a blanket of peace cover me. Sleep took over my eyes as we passed through the turbulence, and the bible became my pillow on the pull down table from the seat in front of me. Later I woke up to the pilot announcing that we would be descending soon! You can’t begin to imagine our delight!

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This is me.

 

Another two hour ride awaited us as we found my dad’s friend waiting for us outside of the airport! Ours was a warm family welcome as he lead us out to the car. And then we were off! I could probably say that by now, I know the route by heart. We rode with the windows down, to breathe in the fresh air that already began to cleanse our lungs. The blankets of green grass, and mountainous scenery was a welcome familiarity. It felt like home. As I looked out the window, watching people, buses and cars pass by, I could only think and wonder to myself what God has prepared for us in the days of our stay. To be honest with you, I have no desires to go back to Florida, but I won’t let the end of our trip steal my joy! Today God has blessed me with a wonderful portion of His grace as I sit across the room from my childhood best friend.

We have so many wonderful memories waiting to be made.

My only question is, “What will happen next?” ….

My Portion of Grace

Hello friends! I know it’s been a while since my last post, and I would like to apologize for that. To be honest with you, the past couple of weeks have been of great growth in my personal relationship with Christ: spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and as well personally with my family.

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Photo by Jeremy Gallman on Unsplash.

I can tell you that since my deliverance from depression– all thanks to Jesus Christ! I have a lot more clarity, joy, and ability to reason and see the reality of things with a new perspective through faith (2 Corinthians 5:7). This new perspective is greater than my own. It is God’s perspective. I’ve realized that life doesn’t revolve around me, but rather, my life is one of servitude to God and others around me. My life is a testament to the wonders of what God has done, will do, and is most importantly doing right now in my life; here today, at this very moment. To keep this perspective I must forget about what is passed and what not yet is, but keep my eyes fixed on Jesus.

 

Ever since my family returned from Costa Rica last July, we have fought an uphill battle. Recalling what God spoke to us in the mountains of that beautiful land, He gave each of us (my dad, brother and myself) confirmations in regard to prophetic promises that have been already spoken over our lives. These promises are directed towards our ministries and personal lives a like, all for the glory of Jesus Christ. After we returned back to the flat lands of Florida, here in the valley was where our faith was put to the test. With little to no breaks, the enemy has been bashing us from left to right. Two days after returning from Costa Rica, we were run out of our apartment with other tenants who were victims of an arson fire, due to the envies of criminal activity in our neighborhood. We with the seven other families, were homeless for two weeks, but God provided everything we needed. Then the time came that we moved into our new apartment; renovated and at the same price for the other one that was lost in the fire. Keeping our home unfurnished, we’ve stuck to the essentials as we wait for our time to go. In the meantime, our neighborhood continued to get worse before it got better, but the Lord heard our prayers and there are huge changes happening in this complex for the better. The ghetto will no longer be the ghetto. Thank you Jesus!

While these changes have been occurring, Jesus has also been making changes within me. He has been enlightening the dark chambers of my heart and affirming my faith in Him to the certainty of His promises everyday. His consistency and grace has relieved me from the fears that plagued my heart. The fears that told me that God wouldn’t do what He promised.

Around two weeks ago, I searched the scriptures of my bible to better understand what the apostle Paul meant when he quoted the Lord our God who said, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9)” I’ve heard this verse repeated so many times before, but left without explanation. It was only for me to know that God’s grace is enough. This quote from the bible made me feel like a child who asks, “but why mommy?” and mommy’s only reply is a short, “because I said so.”

It probably might even come as a shock to you that in the intimacy of my prayers, I cried out to God and told Him that He wasn’t enough. I desperately wanted Him to be enough, but in my desperation, He wasn’t. In love, my Heavenly Father knew what to do with that prayer, and He showed me that He is indeed everything that I need.

So the next day after that prayer I went to the back of my bible to the concordance. I looked up the words “portion” and “grace”. I wrote down every scripture that cited those two words and thanks to God, my understanding was greatly opened!

I’ll add the scriptures to the bottom of this post if you desire to search the bible for yourself on these topics, but what I learned is this:

Psalm 16:5-6 says O Lord, You are the portion of my inheritance and my cup; You maintain my lot. The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places; Yes, I have a good inheritance.

Jesus himself is my portion. A small sentence, yet full of so much meaning for the believer. The bible says in John 10:10 that Jesus came to give us life in abundance. This abundant life is given to us due to the blood sacrifice He made for us on the cross, because Jesus was wounded for our transgressions, and crushed for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him (see Isaiah 53). Jesus died so that we could be a part of his inheritance as children of God; no longer slaves to sin or to our own weaknesses but through Jesus’ sufferings, we are able to enjoy the daily provision of life that God gives to those who believe in faith.

The bible says in Acts 17:26-28 From one man he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands. God did this so that they would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from any one of us. ‘For in him we live and move and have our being.’

So because of the cross, I am able to live a full life of joy in the presence of God (Psalm 16:11). The inheritance and the lot that God gives me today is not necessarily material riches, but they are my daily needs (Matthew 6:9). God has assigned to each of us the place on earth where we are to live and the appointed time we are to remain in that place, because there is a purpose. There is purpose in which I am to remain in Florida for the time being, because this is where God has placed me and my family to draw closer to Him. For today in this moment, this is my portion from God. Though we live in the ghetto, we have never been harmed, without food, clothing, or the means to pay the bills. We have health, education, and we have each other. We have all of this because of God’s grace. Not because we deserve it, but because of his mercies that extend to us here and now, regardless of His promises for our future, He loves us and gives us everything we need today. We have this fullness when we realize that Jesus gives us this grace when we make an exchange of our lives for His at the feet of the cross.

Grace doesn’t end there. Our inheritance and portion of eternal life is found in the resurrection of Jesus Christ. When Jesus died he was given authority to take up his life again because he had no sin (John 10:17-18, 2 Corinthians 5:21). He humbled himself in such a way– to save the life of sinners and to give us freedom– that God exalted him and sat him at His right hand (Philippians 2:5-11; Mark 10:45; Mark 16:9). Jesus is the first example of what our glorified bodies will be like when we pass away from this world and resurrect in Him (1 Corinthians 15:20, 40-44). Jesus is the resurrection and the life; whoever believes in Him will live even if he dies (John 11:25). Those who think of such things purify themselves as they fix their eyes on Jesus Christ (1 John 3:1-3). Doing this we honor God’s command that says, “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth … but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. “For where your treasre is, there your heart will be also.

How gracious is the God that I serve! How much more can I entrust Him with my life when He gave us His only Son to die in our place? If He’s able to care for my eternal inheritance through Jesus Christ, how much more is He able to guard the inheritances of His promises to me and my family?

 For when God made a promise to Abraham, because He could swear by no one greater, He swore by Himself,  saying, “Surely blessing I will bless you, and multiplying I will multiply you.” And so, after he had patiently endured, he obtained the promise. For men indeed swear by the greater, and an oath for confirmation is for them an end of all dispute. Thus God, determining to show more abundantly to the heirs of promise the immutability of His counsel, confirmed it by an oath,  that by two immutable things, in which it is impossible for God to lie, we might have strong consolation, who have fled for refuge to lay hold of the hope set before us. This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast, and which enters the Presence behind the veil, where the forerunner has entered for us, even Jesus, having become High Priest forever according to the order of Melchizedek (Hebrews 6:13-20).

I thank God for his love and his faithfulness because the whole year in which has passed I have been at unease in having to return to Costa Rica to face the promises that are for me, but not being able to claim them yet. God’s timing is perfect and purposeful. In two days we’ll return to the place where our hearts are most delighted on earth, but we have our hope in God. He knows how to get us there. His ways are greater, and there is much to learn along the way.

Please pray for my family that we may have safe travels and be empowered by the Holy Spirit to share the gospel of Jesus Christ with boldness, to those who need to hear the word of God from us while we’re in Costa Rica.

I hope to keep up with my blog while we’re there! I know that I’ll have lots more to share. I hope that you may also be able to rest in the portion of grace that God has given to you today. Lets together keep our eyes fixed on Jesus Christ (Hebrews 12:1-2)! ❤

“Portion”: Psalm 16:5, 73:26, 119:57; Isaiah 53:12, 61:7; Jeremiah 10:16; Lamentations 3:24; Matthew 24:51; Luke 12:42, 15:12.

“Grace”: Genesis 6:8; Psalm 45:2, 84:11; Zechariah 12:10; Luke 2:40; John 1:17; Acts 4:33; Romans 5:17, 11:6; 2 Corinthians 12:9, 13:14, 8:9; Galatians 5:4; Ephesians 1:7, 2:8, 4:7, 6:24; Hebrews 12:28; James 4:6; 2 Peter 3:18.

Disclaimer: I am not a scholar or a theologian. I’m just a repentant sinner who has a personal relationship with her Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.