Scholarship Update

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Photo by Andrew Neel on Unsplash.

Hi guys,

How are all of you doing? I’ve been so busy studying and trying to find new scholarships to help pay for school that it takes up a lot of my time.

Since I’m on the topic of scholarships, I just want to say thank you to everyone who voted for me in last November. Unfortunately, my entry didn’t make it to the next round. So, I’m out.

I also want to take a moment to let my readers know about the many scholarship opportunities that are out there. I did some legwork and found out that students can go to their public libraries, check newspapers, magazines and search scholarship websites like Fastweb and Scholarships.com to help them land great scholarships. I’ve also even heard good information about scholarships for categories that fit my qualifications through friends and family by word of mouth. I’m Hispanic, I have a 4.0 GPA, I live in a low-income community, and I want to volunteer in my neighborhood. So maybe if you’re Hispanic too and like Goya, you can check out their website and sign up for their scholarship. Do you like to shop at JCPenny, and eat at Burger King? Taking a look at their scholarship offers might be worth a shot. Check out their websites, and you might qualify for some of their scholarships.

I also can’t stress enough about opportunities that high school students have to land some awards. They benefit from communicating with their guidance counselors to help them sign up for scholarships ahead of time. I’m kind of paying the price for not listening to my high school counselors who told me ahead of time to sign up for scholarships. I didn’t even know if I wanted to pursue a college degree at that time, but I had a change of heart since then.

Now, I want to study! 🙂

If you’re like me and in need of scholarships there are so many options! Just look around your in your community, check the library, and go online.

Do you know of any scholarship information and tips that I and other readers can put to use? Please, write down them down in the comments below. Thanks for reading and for your all your help.

Have a great day, guys! God bless.

 

Create-a-Greeting Card Scholarship

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Photo by rawpixel.com on Unsplash.

Hello there readers,

Right now I’m signing up for scholarships and I came across this great scholarship opportunity. All you have to do is create an original greeting card and you could win $10k for school. If anyone needs scholarship money I attached the link right here. Details for their rules are on the website.

May the best artist win!

Rosa de Saron

Update

Hi everyone,

I just want to give you all an update. I will be posting a new blog post very soon. I’ve been busy since my last post in June. I’m sorry it’s taken so long. I just graduated in May 2017 and now I enrolled to start working on my Bachelor’s degree. I wish you all well.

Those who read my blog are in my heart and in my prayers.  God bless you all.

Sincerely,

Rosa de Saron

Dance With Me

Last night I had a beautiful dream that I’m really excited to share with you! It’s short and sweet but very lovely.

I dreamt that I was in my kitchen, and I was facing the wall where the clock hangs. I don’t really remember what I was doing in the kitchen, but I know that I was remembering the Word of God in my heart.

In front of me was a white card floating in the air with my name on in lowercase letters: rose of sharon (which means, the church or bride of Christ).

Then behind the card was a large, white cloud that formed into a man. It was Jesus Christ.

He stretched out his hand to me, and said, “It is I. The God that you serve.”

I took his hand and we shared a secret! Then we danced in the kitchen, I gave him a hug, and the dream ended.

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Photo by Alvin Mahmudov on Unsplash.

Quiet Observer

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Photo by Siddharth Bhogra on Unsplash.

So I’m at the library doing homework because there’s no Wi-Fi at home. I already finished what I needed to do, but I’m more intrigued by whats happening in front of me. There’s is a young Asian girl of about fifteen or sixteen years old sitting in the table across from me. She seems to be doing homework but from what I can observe she’s learning arithmetic. However, she’s not alone. She’s dependent on an elderly man who tutors her. She’s like a small child in her comprehension, and the old man sighs with exasperation at her childlike understanding, but I like to imagine that he feels useful to her.

 

There’s a complex story in front of me that I will probably never know about. Maybe an immigrant girl’s future, and a native old man of these Great States, who’s lived so much and willing to give to her that gift. The gift of inspiration and education. The gift of encouragement to take advantage of life and to make something of herself! A gift that many young people with the privilege take for granted today.

Who knows what will become of them both. Sometimes I feel like a quiet spectator given the opportunity to take a glimpse into the lives of strangers, or even of friends and family. I love to live, but I also take pleasure in observing– even if at times what I see is painful because I suffer in silence with them. But these small glimpses are the little golden nuggets of life that I treasure forever. Even if they don’t happen to me and I’m just sitting on the outside looking in…..

Dancing with Jesus

The growing pains of a transitioning season is never easy. Especially when you have a tendency to be so hard on yourself. I constantly tell myself I need to be better, I need to try harder, I need to– let go. It’s so frustrating to think that you’re making progress but you only feel like you’re taking two steps back, a step to the side, and another one forward– and then it becomes a dance.

“What am I doing?”

Here I am dancing with the Lord.

I don’t know how to dance at all really. Rhythm is not something I inherited. I’m awkward and clumsy. You’d think that being Puerto Rican, I should know how to just feel the music.

“How do you keep time? This is so unnatural to me. I feel incompetent.

What? What am I doing?”

As the music begins to play, I freeze— I try to analyze the components of the song– but Jesus takes me in his arms and wraps one arm around my waist, taking my other hand in his and says, “Follow me.”

“Jesus I don’t know the steps! I’m so lost! Slow down! What are you doing? Help me!”

“Relax.” He says, “Trust me and follow my lead.”

I’m in tears as I feel so embarrassed for every step that crushes His toes, for messing up, not keeping the beat. I’m a clutz. I begin to whine, “Jesus, I can’t do this. I’m a failure.”

“Child, My grace is sufficient for you. Let’s keep going.”

The song continues, the most beautiful song I’ve ever heard. Accompanied by an orchestra of love that harmonizes with compassion, gentleness, understanding and grace. I look up at my Savior with eyes full of awe and wonder as He sweeps me off my feet. Satisfied with myself I begin to think, “hey, I’m beginning to get the hang of this!” Aware of my progress, He adds in a new move, but I’m completely thrown off again! “Whoa, God, slow down! I can’t keep up!”

“I’ve got you”, He says.

The tears start rolling as I weep into His shoulders. The sweet scent of His aroma fills my nostrils and pours into my heart as He holds me close to His. He comforts me in His embrace with every step we take. Not once does He rebuke me, but He takes the time to teach me gently. Letting me know that it’s okay. It’s okay not to know how to dance.

It’s okay to not be the best, it’s okay to be myself. It’s okay to be clumsy and make mistakes. Just as long as I keep on dancing with Him. As long as I stop trying so hard to do things by my own strength, as long as I just trust Him.

“Relax.” He says, “And let My Spirit flow through you. Confide in me and I will teach you. What you don’t know is that I’m preparing you to teach others how to dance too.”

 This is what the Lord says:

“Cursed is the one who trusts in man,
    who draws strength from mere flesh
    and whose heart turns away from the Lord.
That person will be like a bush in the wastelands;
    they will not see prosperity when it comes.
They will dwell in the parched places of the desert,
    in a salt land where no one lives.

 “But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord,
    whose confidence is in him.
They will be like a tree planted by the water
    that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
    its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
    and never fails to bear fruit.”

Jeremiah 17:5-8

Your Word is a Lamp Unto My Feet

 

I remember the time I went to the Cave Window back in April for spring break. I remember what it felt like to enter in that damp, dark cavern with only a small light to illuminate my feet. I could literally only see the steps in front of me. Then I had to pass through a tight, uncomfortable space before the light at the end of the tunnel flooded my eyes, and welcomed me with a warmth of wonder and surprise. I didn’t understand or know where I was going but the guide led me along the unfamiliar path. Then all of a sudden, I was there. I was staring in the face of God’s promises for my life.

 

Looking back from that experience to where I am now in life helps to give me perspective. I really don’t understand what’s going on right now in the midst of this uncertainty accompanied with the desires of my heart, and the promises of God’s breakthrough for my family. To tell you the truth, I don’t know how we’re going to get there, but I’m just trusting God.

Allow me to rewind a little bit to about a year ago.

Two days after we returned from our trip to Costa Rica, we were run out of our apartment due to an arson that set the building up in flames. We were homeless for about a month, but God faithfully provided us with this apartment. We received orders from the Lord not to furnish our home, but only to keep the essentials that we needed. We knew that we wouldn’t be here for much longer.

When we got back from Costa Rica this year, God said that it’s time for us to move. Again.

But the thing is, we’ll be moving to another apartment for a month while the new company that bought this complex is completely renovating each building. Hallelujah, because God has answered the prayers of those who desired to see this ghetto cleaned up and restored! I am really thankful to the Lord for this because it’s time this place got a new start! Our hearts however, are set on packing up to go elsewhere. I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you, hehe.

My daddy calls this particular move, Abraham day. He shared with me that when he was in the drug rehabilitation ministry, that his spiritual father set days to shake out all of the brothers in the program from their comfort zones by relocating each of them to a new bed and to another room. My dad used this example to help me understand that God also sets seasons in our lives to shake us out of our comfort zones so that we don’t get too settled in one place.

But I’m here like, “God, did you really have to do it the day after we go back to school?!”

I’m not complaining though! I’m taking this part of the season in strides. I know that there is blessing in this. The benefit of it is that we will at least come back to enjoy the new apartment’s complete renovation! — Until God moves us again.

There is another reason as to why I feel the need to share with you the uncertainty of this particular season that is laying heavy on my heart, and it doesn’t have anything to do with the move, or it’s inconvenience for that matter. It actually has to do with the mystery of what’s become of my mother.

About a few months ago I wrote a Letter to Mom and I got a Reply From Mom in return.

Basically what happened to my mom is this: My mom divorced my dad when I was nine, and completely left my life when I was sixteen. She was diagnosed with a severe case of bipolarism, schizophrenia and paranoia after she had a miscarriage of twins. What I can remember from my mom before then was that she was a strong godly woman but that she later turned her back on the Lord. God used her powerfully as a prophetess. When the Lord spoke to her and revealed things to her about the hidden sins of others, she spoke with words of authority and judgment to the unrepentant sinners, and what the Holy Spirit predicted through her always came to pass. She was a prayer warrior, and an avid faster. She was also a good mother, like a lioness, always ready to protect her babies. She was strong, and fierce but she had one weakness: She had a track record of unfaithfulness to the Lord. She would get right with God and then backslide to the ways of the world on a pursuit of her own will, not God’s. Each and every time she left God’s side, she dug her own holes deeper into sins unimaginable for a child of God, and they swallowed her like quicksand.

It’s not to say that God can’t heal her, because He most certainly can. There is undeniable power in the name of Jesus. But He gives everyone free will and she chose to harden her heart to the One who paid the price of her sins at the cross. That’s why it saddened me to find out a few days after returning from Costa Rica this year that my mom disappeared. According to her living-mate, she came home one night completely belligerent and indecently dressed. She was saying that “God told her” to get off of her meds and find her kids with a man that she was having an affair with, a so called, Vincent Gambini (a dead mafioso). She quit her job, bought a random car and went on a lone road trip. Last we heard, the high way patrol found her broken down car abandoned on the side of the highway. Where is she? Only God knows…. We’ve been waiting for information as we’ve also contacted the police; but here we are with our hands tied. Waiting. What could have become of my mom?

I had a dream about her three nights ago. In the dream she called me, and I asked her where she was and if she was okay? But she hung up. I shared this dream with my dad, and by no coincidence he had the same dream that same night too. What could that mean? Could God be preparing our hearts for something?…

I told God and frequently tell him again and again, “Lord, I know you promised me lots of things concerning my mom. You promised me her restoration, and that you would heal her and use her again to testify about the dangers of walking away from you. But you know what’s best, God. I won’t be mad at you if what you promised doesn’t come to pass because I know that it is impossible for you to lie (Hebrews 6:18). Just give my mom peace from this torment that she’s living. Only you know if she will ever live with a repentant heart. If not, give her the opportunity to repent in the face of death, and take her home with you. My only request to you Lord is that my mom not die in her sins. Jesus, have mercy on her soul…”

These words are on my heart everyday that the mystery of my mom is kept sealed. I just pray for the light of knowing what’s happened to her. To accept something. To know that she’s ok. To move on. This is really hard for me to process, because I was always holding on to the hope of being reunited to the woman of God I remember her to be. I pray for her well being though. Whether here on earth, but more so for her eternity. If I can’t have her back now, then I hope to see her again in heaven.

So here I am walking through the temporary season of this dark cave. With boxes cluttering my room, filled with the reminder of Abraham day. But more so with the hopes of God’s promises for my family and my life. I hold fast to what the Word of God promises me in places like Jeremiah 29:11 and Isaiah 55:8-9. I’ve decided not to let my heart be troubled and not to be afraid because Jesus is here to take me by the hand and lead me to the flood of light that I once saw at the end of the way– that day I went into the cave.

The Little Ant

 

 

I like to watch the ants work. They’re so busy and preoccupied with their work that they don’t notice this giant human looking down on them. They’re so busy cutting up leaves, trying to haul them along on their little backs to their little colony. They’re just trying to save up and provide for their little antly needs. My existence and my life is so irrelevant to them; they just keep on working.

Many times we are like the ants too. It’s easy to get caught up in the stress of our lives that we don’t realize our Heavenly Father waiting for us to look up at Him. He’s waiting for us to enjoy His existence and His life by seeking Him and His Kingdom first. He is the Provider of everything we need. How much more will our Father give us when we ask Him, if He so freely provides the ants with what they need?

Or do we not realize that this world and everything in it is passing away? One day Jesus will come back for His church, His bride; and if we are so preoccupied with this world we will miss our Groom’s return which is so near! It will happen in the blink of an eye! One second we’re here, the next we’ll meet our Redeemer in the sky! Everyone on this earth who isn’t ready will stay behind. I don’t know about you but I don’t want to miss my own wedding with Jesus Christ!

I don’t want to be like the ants, who work so hard for a provision that only fills my belly for a moment; a provision that only clothes and shelters my body with materials that can be lost, stolen or broken. I want to store up my treasures for eternity, to live and share my life with my Groom, my Jesus! I want to meet Him face to face, and live with Him under the covering of His love for ever and ever!

What about you? Are you ready for the rapture? Or are you an ant who is meaninglessly toiling their life away? It is good to work, but don’t forget to whom your life belongs.

Disclaimer: I am not a scholar or a theologian. I’m just a repentant sinner who has a personal relationship with her Lord, Jesus Christ.

Only The Beginning

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Still trying to process how much Jesus loves me. Still trying to process the things that He is beginning to bring to pass for me. Still trying to process that Jeremiah 29:11 is God’s plan for me and all I can do is cry. All I can do is stare at the beauty of God’s hands and thank Him for the grace given to me today, and ask Him to give me the strength and the courage of Joshua 1:9.

To live, and breathe is beautiful and I am thankful to share my tears with Him as I stare out into the mountains in the presence of His love. I am undeserving of such great blessings. All I can do is cry. We just arrived in Costa Rica a week ago, and I’m already beginning to see the beautiful promises that God has for my life personally, begin to unfold, and it’s overwhelming. I can’t go too deep in detail yet, but I can tell you that this feels all too surreal. I still can’t even believe that I’m here. I can’t believe that I’m part of the choir, and that I might be coming back sooner than what I expected. I can’t even begin to express to you in words how beautiful the presence of God fills this whole church when the whole congregation begins to worship the One True Living God! His embrace is tangible as He begins to crumble the hardened areas of my heart. It’s literally like a breeze of purity that flows through the whole building and it gently lifts up one’s hands in surrender.

Love. It’s pure love. His presence is love and it consumes my whole soul as I give Him all of me, and He gives me strength in return. I’m in love and this can’t be real. This can’t be real but it’s all too real. I’m still trying to process this; Jesus is so real. His tomb is empty, He’s alive, and He’s with me. He’s my groom and I’m His bride. I’m letting go of all of the distractions on the way to the alter as I run to His arms. I’m letting go of the past as He shows me that I have no more shame to suffer. I am His. He is mine, and in my life He will be glorified.

I’m so in awe of my God, and this is only the beginning of what He’s promised me! As the attacks of the enemy come my way to try to steal my joy, my hope, and my peace, the Holy Spirit will remind me that Jesus gave me life in abundance, and that He already overcame the world. Fear is an illusion that can’t stand up to the giant that is my God, because my Maker is my husband. No weapons formed against me shall prosper because the Lord Almighty is my righteousness and He fights for me.  It is finished. My life is complete at the cross.

Jesus, you are for me. What I can’t do, you can. I surrender my all to you.

My Portion of Grace

Hello friends! I know it’s been a while since my last post, and I would like to apologize for that. To be honest with you, the past couple of weeks have been of great growth in my personal relationship with Christ: spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and as well personally with my family.

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Photo by Jeremy Gallman on Unsplash.

I can tell you that since my deliverance from depression– all thanks to Jesus Christ! I have a lot more clarity, joy, and ability to reason and see the reality of things with a new perspective through faith (2 Corinthians 5:7). This new perspective is greater than my own. It is God’s perspective. I’ve realized that life doesn’t revolve around me, but rather, my life is one of servitude to God and others around me. My life is a testament to the wonders of what God has done, will do, and is most importantly doing right now in my life; here today, at this very moment. To keep this perspective I must forget about what is passed and what not yet is, but keep my eyes fixed on Jesus.

 

Ever since my family returned from Costa Rica last July, we have fought an uphill battle. Recalling what God spoke to us in the mountains of that beautiful land, He gave each of us (my dad, brother and myself) confirmations in regard to prophetic promises that have been already spoken over our lives. These promises are directed towards our ministries and personal lives a like, all for the glory of Jesus Christ. After we returned back to the flat lands of Florida, here in the valley was where our faith was put to the test. With little to no breaks, the enemy has been bashing us from left to right. Two days after returning from Costa Rica, we were run out of our apartment with other tenants who were victims of an arson fire, due to the envies of criminal activity in our neighborhood. We with the seven other families, were homeless for two weeks, but God provided everything we needed. Then the time came that we moved into our new apartment; renovated and at the same price for the other one that was lost in the fire. Keeping our home unfurnished, we’ve stuck to the essentials as we wait for our time to go. In the meantime, our neighborhood continued to get worse before it got better, but the Lord heard our prayers and there are huge changes happening in this complex for the better. The ghetto will no longer be the ghetto. Thank you Jesus!

While these changes have been occurring, Jesus has also been making changes within me. He has been enlightening the dark chambers of my heart and affirming my faith in Him to the certainty of His promises everyday. His consistency and grace has relieved me from the fears that plagued my heart. The fears that told me that God wouldn’t do what He promised.

Around two weeks ago, I searched the scriptures of my bible to better understand what the apostle Paul meant when he quoted the Lord our God who said, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness. (2 Corinthians 12:9)” I’ve heard this verse repeated so many times before, but left without explanation. It was only for me to know that God’s grace is enough. This quote from the bible made me feel like a child who asks, “but why mommy?” and mommy’s only reply is a short, “because I said so.”

It probably might even come as a shock to you that in the intimacy of my prayers, I cried out to God and told Him that He wasn’t enough. I desperately wanted Him to be enough, but in my desperation, He wasn’t. In love, my Heavenly Father knew what to do with that prayer, and He showed me that He is indeed everything that I need.

So the next day after that prayer I went to the back of my bible to the concordance. I looked up the words “portion” and “grace”. I wrote down every scripture that cited those two words and thanks to God, my understanding was greatly opened!

I’ll add the scriptures to the bottom of this post if you desire to search the bible for yourself on these topics, but what I learned is this:

Psalm 16:5-6 says O Lord, You are the portion of my inheritance and my cup; You maintain my lot. The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places; Yes, I have a good inheritance.

Jesus himself is my portion. A small sentence, yet full of so much meaning for the believer. The bible says in John 10:10 that Jesus came to give us life in abundance. This abundant life is given to us due to the blood sacrifice He made for us on the cross, because Jesus was wounded for our transgressions, and crushed for our iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him (see Isaiah 53). Jesus died so that we could be a part of his inheritance as children of God; no longer slaves to sin or to our own weaknesses but through Jesus’ sufferings, we are able to enjoy the daily provision of life that God gives to those who believe in faith.

The bible says in Acts 17:26-28 From one man he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands. God did this so that they would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him, though he is not far from any one of us. ‘For in him we live and move and have our being.’

So because of the cross, I am able to live a full life of joy in the presence of God (Psalm 16:11). The inheritance and the lot that God gives me today is not necessarily material riches, but they are my daily needs (Matthew 6:9). God has assigned to each of us the place on earth where we are to live and the appointed time we are to remain in that place, because there is a purpose. There is purpose in which I am to remain in Florida for the time being, because this is where God has placed me and my family to draw closer to Him. For today in this moment, this is my portion from God. Though we live in the ghetto, we have never been harmed, without food, clothing, or the means to pay the bills. We have health, education, and we have each other. We have all of this because of God’s grace. Not because we deserve it, but because of his mercies that extend to us here and now, regardless of His promises for our future, He loves us and gives us everything we need today. We have this fullness when we realize that Jesus gives us this grace when we make an exchange of our lives for His at the feet of the cross.

Grace doesn’t end there. Our inheritance and portion of eternal life is found in the resurrection of Jesus Christ. When Jesus died he was given authority to take up his life again because he had no sin (John 10:17-18, 2 Corinthians 5:21). He humbled himself in such a way– to save the life of sinners and to give us freedom– that God exalted him and sat him at His right hand (Philippians 2:5-11; Mark 10:45; Mark 16:9). Jesus is the first example of what our glorified bodies will be like when we pass away from this world and resurrect in Him (1 Corinthians 15:20, 40-44). Jesus is the resurrection and the life; whoever believes in Him will live even if he dies (John 11:25). Those who think of such things purify themselves as they fix their eyes on Jesus Christ (1 John 3:1-3). Doing this we honor God’s command that says, “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth … but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. “For where your treasre is, there your heart will be also.

How gracious is the God that I serve! How much more can I entrust Him with my life when He gave us His only Son to die in our place? If He’s able to care for my eternal inheritance through Jesus Christ, how much more is He able to guard the inheritances of His promises to me and my family?

 For when God made a promise to Abraham, because He could swear by no one greater, He swore by Himself,  saying, “Surely blessing I will bless you, and multiplying I will multiply you.” And so, after he had patiently endured, he obtained the promise. For men indeed swear by the greater, and an oath for confirmation is for them an end of all dispute. Thus God, determining to show more abundantly to the heirs of promise the immutability of His counsel, confirmed it by an oath,  that by two immutable things, in which it is impossible for God to lie, we might have strong consolation, who have fled for refuge to lay hold of the hope set before us. This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, both sure and steadfast, and which enters the Presence behind the veil, where the forerunner has entered for us, even Jesus, having become High Priest forever according to the order of Melchizedek (Hebrews 6:13-20).

I thank God for his love and his faithfulness because the whole year in which has passed I have been at unease in having to return to Costa Rica to face the promises that are for me, but not being able to claim them yet. God’s timing is perfect and purposeful. In two days we’ll return to the place where our hearts are most delighted on earth, but we have our hope in God. He knows how to get us there. His ways are greater, and there is much to learn along the way.

Please pray for my family that we may have safe travels and be empowered by the Holy Spirit to share the gospel of Jesus Christ with boldness, to those who need to hear the word of God from us while we’re in Costa Rica.

I hope to keep up with my blog while we’re there! I know that I’ll have lots more to share. I hope that you may also be able to rest in the portion of grace that God has given to you today. Lets together keep our eyes fixed on Jesus Christ (Hebrews 12:1-2)! ❤

“Portion”: Psalm 16:5, 73:26, 119:57; Isaiah 53:12, 61:7; Jeremiah 10:16; Lamentations 3:24; Matthew 24:51; Luke 12:42, 15:12.

“Grace”: Genesis 6:8; Psalm 45:2, 84:11; Zechariah 12:10; Luke 2:40; John 1:17; Acts 4:33; Romans 5:17, 11:6; 2 Corinthians 12:9, 13:14, 8:9; Galatians 5:4; Ephesians 1:7, 2:8, 4:7, 6:24; Hebrews 12:28; James 4:6; 2 Peter 3:18.

Disclaimer: I am not a scholar or a theologian. I’m just a repentant sinner who has a personal relationship with her Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.